Democrat National Hate Fest Convention
Charlotte, North Carolina


Tuesday, September 4, 2012

10:00 AM
Singing of "Gov. Bless A Marxist, Ah"

10:15 AM
"I Hate Republicans!!!111!!!ONE!11!"
DNC Nasty Dull Package Debbie Whattamoron Schultz

11:30 AM
(warning: no break for lunch)
"I Really Hate Republicans!!!11!!!!1ELEVENTY!1111!!!ONE!11!"
DNC NDP Schultz

1:30 PM
"No, Really, I Really, Really, REALLY Hate — H!-A!-T!-E! — HATE! Republicans!!!11!!!!1ELEVENHUNDREDELEVENTY!1111!...1!"
DNC NDP Schultz

2:30 PM
Late Lunch
menu: bile burgers, spleen ventison, bitter nutcakes

3:15 PM
"Republicans's War on the Entire Known Universe and Everything and Everyone in It"
Propaganda Council (Ballroom H)

4:00 PM
Delegate Questionnaire:
"Do You Hate Republicans? __Yes or __Yes!!!11...!1!!"

4:15 PM
"Special Thank You for All You've Done for Our Party"
honoring NBC, CNN, CBS, NPR, ABC, PBS, NYT, etc., etc.

5:30 PM
Early Dinner
catered by Chick-fil-A
(the staff member responsible for hiring caterers has been sacked... so BYO dinner)

6:15 PM
"Best. Stimulus. Ever.: Food Stamps"
Democrat Agricultureless Secretary Tom Vilsack

7:45 PM
"One of the Prettiest Sounds on Earth at Sunset"
Islamic Call To Prayer

8:15 PM
"Keep Them Bail-Outs Comin'"
UAW President Bob King and Former Democrat Governor of Michigan Jennifer Granholm

9:00 PM
"If You Don't Vote For Øblamo, You're Racist!"
Black Caucus (Ballroom R)

9:30 PM
(cancelled)
"'Jobs' and Other Three-Letter Words"
Vice President Joe Biden


Wednesday, September 5, 2012

10:00 AM
Singing of "Don't Worry, Be Happy"

10:15 AM
"Another Day, Another 'I Hate Republicans!!!111!!!ONE!11!' Speech"
DNC NDP Schultz

12:15 PM
Lunch
menu: non-transfat burgers, micro sodas

1:15 PM
"Show Me Da Taxpayers' Money!"
Ex-CEO, Solyndra

1:45 PM
"Finland Is Where the Jobs Are At!"
Ex-CEO, Fisker Automotive

2:10 PM
"How to Steal Steel Jobs in Three Easy Steps"
Øblamo Top Bundler Jonathan Lavine, Bain Capital Managing Director

2:30 PM
"The Unemployment Rate Is Sooooo Overrated"
Democrat Laborless Secretary Hilda Solis

3:00 PM
"I'm Furious, So This Will Be A Fast Speech"
Democrat Cover-up Chief Attorney General Eric Holder

3:01 PM
"Oh, Yeah. And I Hate Republicans Too!!!111!ELEVENTY!!ONE!11!"
Democrat CUC AG Holder

3:15 PM
"Republicans Are Worse Than Hilter!"
Demonizerrat Congressman Steve Cohen (TN)

4:30 PM
"If You Don't Like Extremely High Gas Prices, You're Racist!"
Democrat Energyless Secretary Steven Chu

5:30 PM
Early Dinner
catered by Puppies Taste Great!™ (Chicago, IL)

6:30 PM
"Mitt Romney Strangled My Wife! to Death!11!!111!!!!ELENVENTY!!11!ONE!"
ØbamaPAC Tool Joe Soptic

7:15 PM
"Paul Ryan Brutalized My Grandma! to Death!!1!ONEHUNDREDELEVEN!!11!!!!ONE!111!!!!"
Democrat CCCP Chair Steve Israel

8:00 PM
"Republicans Butchered Our Unborn Babies! to Death!1!!!11!!!ONE!1!!!!ELEVENHUNDREDELEVENTY!!11!!!!! ...No, Wait. We Did"
NARAL President Nancy Keenan

8:15 PM
"Under the Umbrella of the Democrat Party"
Communist Party USA Comrade-in-Chief Sam Webb

9:00 PM
"I Still Hate Republicans!!1!!ONE!111!!!ELEVENTY!11!"
DNC NDP Schultz

9:30 PM
(cancelled)
"Okay, So We're the Ones Who Put Y'All in Chains to Begin With"
Vice President Joe Biden


Thursday, September 6, 2012

10:30 AM
Singing of "Barack Hussein Øbama Mmm, Mmm, Mmmmmmm!"

10:45 AM
"In Case You Haven't Heard, I Hate Republicans!!1!!11!111!!ONE!!!!ELEVENTYHUNDREDELEVENTIEST!11!1!!"
DNC NDP Schultz

12:45 PM
Lunch
menu: venom veggies, hatedogs, rancor stew

1:59 PM
(cancelled because no Democrat cares)
"The Nation's Massive Debt Problem That Threatens Us All"
TBD or not

2:00 PM
"Brown-People-Murdering Republicans Should All Die Horrible Deaths!!11111!!!ONE!ONE!11...!1!!!"
David Chalian, Samuel Jackson, and Ellen Barkin

3:00 PM
"Kill Romney!!!!111!1......."
New Tone and Civility Council (Ballroom D)

4:30 PM
"Why African-Americans Ought to Enjoy Their High Unemployment"
Democrat WH Senile Senior Adviser Valerie Jarrett

4:45 PM
(cancelled)
"What If I Told You the Real Unemployment Rate is 16%?"
Democrat WH Economic Advisers Council Chairperson Austan Goolsbee

5:00 PM
"Budgets? We Don't Need No Stinking Budgets!"
Democrat Senate [Mis]Leader Harry Reid

5:30 PM
Golf Seminar
BHØ Mmm, Mmm, Mmmmmm!

6:30 PM
Dinner
catered by Homeless Families Displaced by Democrat Convention

7:15 PM
"If You Don't Believe the Economy's 'Doing Fine,' You're Racist!"
Empty Chair, Democrat WH Jobs Council

8:00 PM
"It's All Bush's Fault!!!ONE!1!!!ELEVEN!!11...!1!!"
Øblamo Deputy Campaign Manager Stephanie Cutter

8:30 PM
"No Free Condoms, No Peace!"
Pelosi Puppet Sandra Fluke

8:59:59.9999 PM
"Finally, I Get to Speak!"
Vice President Joe Biden

9:00:00.0000 PM
"I Thought You Said That Sanda Fluke Is Is A Babe"
Former President Bill Clinton

10:00 PM
"Yes I Am the Greatest.! President.! Evers.!!!!11!!!1!ELEVENTHOUSANDONEHUNDREDELEVENTIES!1!!!11!1!1!!1!"
Baracrook Howinsane Øblamo